Saving money, staying healthy!

I've heard people say that we as a world have become so advanced.  The technology has been changing rapidly.  It's true before cars people had alot of work to do just to get the horse and buggy hitched up ready to go.  People harvested alot of their own food instead of buying it from a store.  Back then they also didn't have alot of processed food then.  People would bring in honey, homemade pies, salsa, etc.... to sell at the store for a profit.  However it wasn't "cheez-wiz, candy bars, boxed macaroni and cheese."  So whats wrong with everyone planting a garden, harvesting the food, any extras canning or freezing.  If you don't have room for a garden then you can buy the produce by the bushel where someone else harvest's it and freeze or can it.  Even if you were to make a peach pie, it won't be as bad as the fake pie filling in cans at the stores now a days.  You can grow mini gardens anywhere!  You can even grow totes of veggies!  It's for your health and your pockets so lets see what you can do!

So that's what I've done.  I have some yellow squash and zucchini in the freezer.  I have canned tomatoes and will be doing green beans.  I also have a cold pantry where i can keep some cabbage and onions.   

Busy Busy Busy

During the times when you have alot on your plate.  It takes pre-planning.  I plan meals or cooking ahead to freeze meals when I may be sitting down in the evening when I watch tv.  Yep, that's right I do it.  I watch tv.  Just because you want to get healthier doesn't mean you have to give up everything.  Weigh what's important to you.  Or learn to multi-task.  I have been going here and there.  For many reasons my entire family hasn't fought me when I've said let's pack up lunch, dinner, and a cooler for drinks.  Everyone always wanted to buy their food out.  They see how expensive and how much more unhealthy than when you make your own food.  The portion sizes are out of control in restaurants lately.  So if it's just errands, fair, race, family trip, fireworks, or anything else that will keep you away from your main food supply - then pack it!  It's pre-planning.  Plan Plan Plan for nutrition and exercise.  It's your key to meeting your goals!!!! Let me know how it goes.

Zucchini

So what can you do with zucchini?  Not much that I could come up with besides grilling it or putting it in zucchini bread.  My friend Marie brought this zucchini dish to a pot luck the other night and I thought I would share it but in a reformed version.  To prepare zucchini for the freezer you can shred it and steam it until becomes translucent.  Then take it out bag it and freeze it.  So to make this dish take it out of the freezer and defrost it - put it in a glass baking pan - prepare some spaghetti sauce with peppers and onions.  She had pork but I was thinking about spicing up some turkey burger for a little more health.  Mixing that with the spaghetti sauce adding it to the zucchini then adding some fat free mozzarella to the top of that.  Then bake it!  Yummy!

Off to the fair!

So as we're going for a full day of fair fun.  Not only are we watching our waistlines but we are also watching our spending.  I have packed lunch, snacks, and  a cooler for drinks.  I love fair food!  A nice sausage and peppers with some french fries and vinegar!  Emmmmmm.....Yummy!  I do know that my stomach doesn't take well to "fried food" anymore.  That's a benefit for me in the long run.  I won't have a full order but I will have a couple.  "Moderation."  I'm packing a whole wheat roll just in case I happen to have half of a sausage with peppers and onions.  My hot dog rolls are half the size of their white roll.  So I still get to experience "fair" but in moderation.  Now some say fair and you know it means carmel apples, cotton candy, funnel cakes, etc.  I love all of that stuff.  My goals to be healthy and fit are much more important to me than "junk."  I will not take part in any of that other "stuff."  Will I someday in the future, probably yes.  After I've met my weight loss goals and am maintaining.  The "stuff" isn't important to me anymore.  It's life that is important!  So as the fair season for you approaches - try things in moderation!!

Taco seasoning!!!

Taco Seasoning



Ingredients

• 1 tablespoon chili powder
• 1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
• 1/4 teaspoon onion powder
• 1/4 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes
• 1/4 teaspoon dried oregano
• 1/2 teaspoon paprika
• 1 1/2 teaspoons ground cumin
• 1 teaspoon sea salt  ( I omit this)
• 1 teaspoon black pepper

I found this recipe for taco seasoning.  These are real spices and aren't packed with preservatives and things that I can't pronounce.  I make several batches of this ahead and keep it stored in a tupperware container.   I use about 3 Tbsp per lb of ground meat.  You can always adjust this for your taste.  I'm sure it's cheaper in the long run and I know it's definately healthier!!

A new healthier veggie dish

Some people wonder what they would do with all these veggies that are about to go bad.  Before they go bad here's a recipe for you. 

Take each of those veggies - just to name a few:  carrots, peppers, onions, yellow squash, zucchini, mushrooms, turnips, or anything else you can find that would be  great in a hot dish.  You slice or dice the veggies the way you want them.  Throw then in a pot add some water and steam some.  Wait for the water to cook down most of the way.  Add some Fat Free Italian dressing.  For those of you who are saying fat free really?  All I want to say is my husband has been on fat free dressing for years.  He loves it and really never had a problem with it since I told him it was healthier.  Give it a try.  It won't hurt.  So back to the recipe really.  You can cook these down the veggies with get soft - it has lots of flavor.  I'm sure you could cook this in a crock-pot as well.  The best way I've found to cook it for flavor was on a campfire in a foil pan.  (helps to save on your pans and dish washing)  Also to make it balanced and some chicken in there and there's a complete "one pot" meal.

Try and enjoy!!!

Making of the larabar

I have wanted some larabars since i've been on my renewed plan however they are pretty expensive.  So, I thought I would see if there was a recipe posted on the internet anywhere and I found most of them on there.  Some that I'd rather not have but I would try for my children.  The healthier one with chocolate are definately better than betty crocker ones.  You can keep them in idividual packages in the fridge.  They are a take and go treat on the way.  I haven't tried any of these yet but  I can't wait to.  I just have to find "dates."  I've never eaten them so I have to see if I can find the healthy ones with no added anything.  Here's what I found on one website:

CASHEW COOKIE



• 16 oz of Dates (whole or chopped)
• 3 cups of unsalted cashews
• 1 tsp vanilla extract

Directions

1. Place the cashews in a food processor and pulse until finely chopped.
2. Add the dates and vanilla, and resume processing until it all comes together in a dough.
3. Press into a foil lined 11×7 Pan, and place in the fridge to cool and harden.
4. Cut into 1 inch by 3 inch bars.
5. Makes about 20.

• 16 oz of Dates (whole or chopped) $4.57
• 3 Cups of Unsalted Cashews $4
• 1 tsp Vanilla (made my own) (i haven't yet but plan too once the vanilla i have on hand gets low)

Total= $8.57! or $0.43 a bar!


Let me know if you try this one or anyother one.  Remember you can find most on google.com just type in larabar recipe and the flavor you want.  I'll update you once I try them.  I'll probably make apple pie!! or peanut butter cookie!! Definately my fav's!

Check our the new surprises on my exercising

My cousin Lyn has been in town and I have actually accompanied her to the gym a few times.  She's showed me what she does or how she started when she went to the gym.  She's a great example.  She's close to her goal weight and she's lost lbs and gotten toned and she has the right mindset.   A great christian Lady.  Alot to be learned yet but I'm getting there.  She was showing me free weights and some core exercises.  She's also showed me alot on the treadmill.  I even got on the elliptical.  I never get on the elliptical because it's torture for me.  However I'm going to try and build my resistance to that machine.  I got on for so many minutes Sunday and Tuesday i will start out on the elliptical and try to do a few more minutes each time I get on it.    The past two nights I've had a visitor on my nightly walk.  To all surprise, my mother has accompanied me.  It's been great time and great walk.  We walked the  1.1 mile track and we will build her up to the 2.0 mile track.  Can't wait for her to be able to see some progress!!!  It's the Ripple effect!

New path

So I went for my walk tonight and decided that the nightly walk i take was definitely not challenging enough for me.  The walk I was taking was like 1.1 miles and this new one was 2.0 miles.  However, it still didn't seem challenging enough so I've got a plan to lengthen it.  to over 3.  So that will be my new walk.  Even though you can walk a certain distance and have it be okay you have to push yourself and so far I'm not to that distance.  The more you loose or the more you get used to something the less calories you will burn.   If you want something you have to go after it.  Do it for yourself, do it to be a good influence to those around you, do it to bring glory to the Lord. 

Breakfast for the wee ones

My oldest son begging to use his waffle maker that he got for Christmas.  I bought whole grain waffle mix a while ago.  So we made whole grain banana pancakes with agave nectar, turkey bacon, and scrambled eggs.  They loved the pancakes.  To tell you the truth I was a little worried about trying it because some of the whole grain/wheat products aren't so tasty.  However, it was delicious.  I'm so glad my family is evolving with me.  The boys love to go on walks now that we moved.  Sometimes I allow them to ride their bikes so that I have a little more fast paced workout to keep up with them.  At points it's almost a jog.    I can't wait to see what our next activity and or next quality healthy meal is. 

Tuna Noodle Casserole Healthy!

Tuna Noodle, yum yum

1 1/2 cups of medium whole wheat egg noodles
1 onion diced
1 garlic clove minced
2 stalks of celery diced
1 cup of chopped mushrooms
1 cup of plain non fat Greek yogurt 
1 teaspoon of lemon juice
2 cans of white albacore tuna packed in water
1/2 cup of skim milk
2 tablespoons of oregano
salt and pepper to taste or leave it out 
a few shakes of Tabasco sauce
2 slices of whole grain bread
1/4 cup grated Parmesan cheese (optional)


Dice all your veggies, next take all your veggies and put them in the skillet just to soften.  From there take your 2 slices of  bread and toast them, when they are finished toasting, add them to a food processor or blender or you can even use a cheese grater.  Set them aside. From here you want to add your tuna to the veggies just to heat through and then add them to a casserole dish, mix in the oregano and Tabasco sauce (low sodium hot sauce if desired).  Now on to the thing that makes tuna noodle casserole creamy.  In a small mixing bowl add your yogurt, lemon juice and milk.  Mix them and pour them over the top of the veggies and tuna.  If desired sprinkle your cheese over the top and top it off with your bread crumbs.  Bake at 350 for about 30 minutes or so depending on your oven.

More More More

So today while being on track more emotional drama hit in several ways.  Uhhh... not to mention it was really hot and with my physical problems all I wanted to do was crawl up with the heating pad!!! Go figure right!  However there was a bright part of the day for dinner I made healthy zitti!  My little boys ate it and loved it.  My hubby even ate it and loved it!!! Homerun!! More wholewheat noodle recipes on the way!!!

What should I do when I'm bored?

So I've been sitting here cruising the Internet figuring out some things for next month when we're on vacation at knoebles campgrounds.  My husband is watching the race.  I'm bored.  I figure I would sit here and talk to you instead of picking up a snack when I'm not even hungry.  Yep, I was doing that too when I was not "on track."  This is the last time I'm gonna break habits. I'm gonna live this way the rest of my life.  This is what I want.  If you live this day over and over and over eventually living a different way will be the odd out of place thing rather than being "on track."  So to keep myself busy I think I'll go grab a dog and go for a walk that way I'm burning some energy.  Besides walking late at night gives me time by myself and gives me some peace.  I pray while I'm out walking.  I talk to the lord while taking in the night sky and the stars.  Watching the trees and the wind.  What a beautiful world he has given us.  Can you imagine what heaven's like if living on earth is supposed to be our hell?

Great tasting whole wheat carbs...

So I wasn't in favor of eating whole wheat products when I first started.  My taste buds are used to the "white" products.  One thing that I found that I like from the start are called Sandwich Thins.  No, I'm not getting anything for saying this but I LOVE these.  You can find them at most any place.  Locally you can find them at the bread outlet store, tops, or sheddens.  I love them with turkey sandwiches, hamburgs, and fried egg sandwich.  Try them!!!

or try these to entice your children to eat some whole wheat products

Calories	120	Sodium	170 mg
Total Fat	2 g	Potassium	0 mg
Saturated	0 g	Total Carbs	19 g
Polyunsaturated	0 g	Dietary Fiber	3 g
Monounsaturated	0 g	Sugars	4 g
Trans	0 g	Protein	4 g
Cholesterol	0 mg
Vitamin A	0%	Calcium	2%
Vitamin C	0%	Iron	8%

 

Calories	120	Sodium	170 mg
Total Fat	2 g	Potassium	0 mg
Saturated	0 g	Total Carbs	19 g
Polyunsaturated	0 g	Dietary Fiber	3 g
Monounsaturated	0 g	Sugars	4 g
Trans	0 g	Protein	4 g
Cholesterol	0 mg
Vitamin A	0%	Calcium	2%
Vitamin C	0%	Iron

A gift of pure enjoyment

Recently we bought a home.  This wasn't even a home I would have considered looking at the pics online.  There was an electric blue room and a hot pink room where both rooms were color on the floor the walls and the ceilings.  The bathroom looked as though you needed a tetanus shot before you entered it.  However we went and looked at it.  It was mid march covered in snow.  In needed some work to make it livable.  When we were done making it livable the snow had melted and we were in for some trouble.  We looked around at our yard and seen it was an entire mess.  We've found bones, glass, and mattress's all around our yard.  The shrubs and such are way over grown.  It looks like nobody took care of it for the past 15 years.  However you can go out lay in the backyard listen to the birds chirp.  It's such a beautiful noise.  A god given noise.  Now that we're past the point of things blooming I've found that I have another beauty around the house.  We have a mulberry tree and alot of "black caps" some people call them blackberries etc.  It's great to be able to walk outside to pick some berries to have on yogurt or on your cereal in the morning.  Totally blessed there.   We are working on the outside of this house while it's warm out and then this fall when its getting colder we will unpack!!! That's right we're camping out of our own house!  Next year we intend on buying some trees to start apple, pear, peach, and plums growing here.  We'd love to have strawberries, blueberries, rhubarb, grapes, and then grow a garden.  I would love to have asparagus, broccoli, cauliflower, cabbage, lettuce, tomato, cucumbers, squash, potato, onion, sweet potato, cantaloupe, watermelon, peppers, pumpkin, and our own little herb garden.  I know it won't all happen next year or start producing next year but with love, care, and prayer I know we will be fruitful. 

Recomitt and weigh in:(

If there's ever a time where you slack off and forget or ignore the reasons you want something, I suggest that all you think about it encourage yourself to get back there.  I don't believe people would start something and not want to continue and finish with it.  If it's important enough to start it's important enough to finish.  So I'm continuing mine, I'm living it ---My journey. 

I want my lifetime of Heath and Happiness.  So after all this depression and health problems I'm sure everyone wants to know what my weight is.  I'm not happy about this but I have gained.  I've gained alot more than I wanted to.  However, I'm letting God run my life.  With his help and Fawns and everyone positive support I'm sure I can start loosing weight and learn how to live this life and not fall into a slump.   My weight is 295 lbs. 

In order to loose weight I'm eating "clean" now.  I'm also started exercising again.  I want to get a bike for me to ride to the gym which is about 7 miles away.  That will have to wait because of funding issues.  That's what I desire anyway.  I'm also making a commitment to blog at least every other day so that blogging helps me stay committed as well. 

Last weight in was                    265 lbs
This weigh in is                         295 lbs

This is a 30 lb weight gain:(

Stay with me, pray for me, and keep me accountable!!!!

A life not yet lived to Health and Happiness? ? ? ?

So the title of my blog is A life not yet lived to Health AND Happiness.  Lately I quit living and I feel like I'm existing watching the world go round without me.  I feel like there's no reason for me to be on this earth.  That there is a little bit of what I'm going through on a daily basis.  There's not one day that doesn't go by that I have shed any tears.  Tears of happiness, NO.  I can't put my finger on what they are mad, angry, pitty, or sad tears.  It's probably a little bit of it all.  I'm experiencing the big "D" word.  Depression.  Enough said.  I don't understand why now.  The only other depression I've dealt with is baby blues.  Someone told me that maybe God has allowed me to be in this depression to learn something.  I know I will gain something from it.  I don't think I have yet but I will.  I hope it's sooner rather than later because I don't like feeling like this.  I'm so glad that I have my husband without him I don't really know how I'd make it.  He is my soul mate - he gets me.  We have been together for 13 years and he can finish my sentences.  He may not look like much to any of you at all but he doesn't have to answer to any of you - he's got a great heart and he's got my heart.  Next my outside of my home family who is there for me and supports me emotionally and doesn't  add to the rest of my stress - thank you.  To my other family.  The ones who support me from inside our side of my church - my christian family you guys really help me so much.  Each little talk or long talk may seem like nothing to you but just think that you may have helped my day be just a little bit better.   Hopefully those talks in the near future will make my day.   This journey of mine is a journey of mindset right now my mind isn't set.  I want it to be so bad.  I want this depression to go away and if it doesn't go away to just be manageable.  This is my journey for life so I'm not as regimented in the ways it used to be but once my mind feels better my body will too and so will my regimen.  Prayer, Prayer, Prayer yes I ask for it and welcome it.  Please pray for me. 

When it rains it poors...... but then you have your great support system

So I have been having trouble getting exercise in as much.  My body is hurting and I've been going through some emotional problems, family problems, and some depression.  I've seen the doctor and just knowing I'm gonna be in a better mood shortly has helped me some already.  While I've been down and out I've had all sorts of people encouraging me.  I'm glad that they're there for me!! I don't know where I'd be without them.  In big trouble I guess. I've had my mom, my pastor, marcy, fawn, and my hubby.  He seems to be my rock always.  I want to get rid of some water weight due to a couple of things before I weigh in again.  Some of it I can get rid of in the next week the rest I will have to deal with for now.  I know I have gained some weight but hopefully with my mind coming back around I can get my head back in the game.  As Fawn has stressed it's about mindset!  I never really understood it until now.  I wish I was given another way of understanding besides going through all this.  As one of my favorite men, friend, and pastor has told me HE WHO HAS BEGUN A GOOD WORK IN YOU WILL BRING IT TO COMPLETION!  It's gonna happen as this weight loss journey started in his time I will finish it with his help in his time.   Keep the prayers coming I can definitely use them.  Love to you all.

Sooo....

It's been forever!! I do mean that.  Wow!  I have been so busy and hadn't realised it's been over 2 weeks since I blogged.  I'm usually busy from the time I wake to the time I go to bed.  After the getting the house fixed up and ready to move into we then moved our things down.  We've unpacked some of those things.  I've been to softball and baseball games and practices alot!!!!   Now we are getting ready for my oldest son's birthday party.  It's going to be outside at our own home for the first time.  So we have to prepare an area for that to happen.  All of our outside needs worked on it but we can't do all of that before the party this weekend.  So we have to concentrate on the one area of the yard that we can use.  There happens to be a tree down from one of the last storms and leaves that haven't been raked in about 15 years all soggy wet.  Twigs, branches, and rocks all in the yard.  This is where we have chosen to have his party in the backyard allowing for some shade.   

During this time I've tried my best to stay on plan.  I know I haven't always exercised like I should.  I need to not do it at home anymore.  I need to get back to the gym.  Dawn and I haven't been doing our weekly weigh in but we've talked about it and we're going to start it again because it keeps us on schedule more easily.  The accountability items are so needed in our lives.  After this new mediaction for my stomach I seem to be doing alot better stomach pain wise.  I'm ready to forge ahead and continue to reach my goal.  Throough this last month or two I have been really troubled with letting my emotions over certain things control me and that's how I was before I started my plan and that's something I never wanted to do again.  I don't want it to be where I go and eat to hide pain and suffering. 

So I won't I'm back on the road......the straight and narrow.  Look out for further updates coming soon!

Asparagus :)

So there's a vegetable I couldn't do much with since my new plan.  Asparagus!!! That says it all for me.  I used to eat it with  hollandaise or melted cheddar cheese.  To find a healthier option I just experimented.  With only one attempt I came up with this dish.  Now I didn't do exact measurements but with healthier ingredients you just worry about over all serving size. 

1.  I steamed the asparagus till almost tender.

2.  I took some fat free Parmesan cheese, pepper, and minced garlic.  Mush it down in a separate bowl.

3.  Put asparagus in a baking dish sprayed with olive oil or pam.

4.  Drop the Parmesan cheese and garlic granules onto the asparagus.

5.  Broil the asparagus until the Parmesan cheese and garlic is a golden brown. 

6.  Eat and enjoy!!

To get ideas I looked at the Internet for different options its easier now when you know what are healthier options. 

Good luck on experimenting with foods.  I can't wait for a bigger kitchen in my own home where I can come up with some more great healthier food options!!!

Stick - to - itness!

So glad everyone is sticking with me through this difficult time for me.  If you weren't here for me I'm not sure I'd still be able to reach my goals.  Even though I seem to be in a road block with my weight loss I'm continuing and pushing through.  We all deserve the best for ourselves.  You got to do what's right for yourself.  If  your out there thinking about changing your life in anyway think on how it would work for you every day.  Don't plan on a diet with food your unhappy with because you will never be able to stay on it.  Experiment with foods you'll learn so much!!

During the difficult times....

Day after day, night after night it seems as though it's one thing after another for me.   There seems to be problem after problem.  Lately it's with my health.  When I got didscouraged before I used to go engorge myself in food and hide while doing it because I was so ashamed.  I'm glad to say I'm not taking my stresses out on food.  I've found other ways in dealing with my stresses.  Have some upcoming tests on my stomach and have been in some extreme pain.  Not just my back or hips but all over my body.  Skin, muscle, and bones.  I just don't understand it but I'm leaving it to the Lord.  Prayers are welcomed.  I can't wait for this pain and stomach problems to decrease so that I can move formward with my goals.  During the hard times I'm learning you have to stay strong.  It's hard but it's worth it!

Update

Update:  I have periods of time where I feel better and do well but then other periods of time where I'm bloated and in pain.  Tomorrow I go to see the GI Dr and I can't wait.  I'm praying for answers.  I want to swiftly move on with my weight loss journey/journey to health and being healthy in the stomach would mean having an easier time of this.  I'm not able to eat 6 small meals a day most of the time.  I have been getting in my exercise and more exercise by working on our new house.  I worked 3 solid days on the floor.  Moving up and down to get on the floor off the floor.  There were muscles used and sore.  Couldn't even imagine what to expect!!  Will update you after the appointment.  I'm definitely hoping for him to offer an endoscopy to see what's going on in there.

My 3 year old has also been really clingy lately and I have found out that I was able to carry him when he needed me to - I haven't done that since he's been able to walk.  Seriously, that long!It didn't take my breath away - I did feel back pain but before it was pain where I was unable to do it.  Today, however I was able to do it.  Tomorrow could be a different story.  With Chronic back pain you never know what's gonna happen.  That's why I'm doing what I can to loose the weight I can to help with my back and many problems that I have.

M o V i N g . . . .

Today we went to the closing of our new home and before my healthier eating that would have been enough for me I would have wanted a nap and now I'm doing that going to the new house to get some things done and more ideas in our heads.  Then we went shopping for some things we needed.  Now we're home and we are getting things around ready for an early morning tomorrow of heading down to the house and starting some more work before the husband has softball practice tomorrow and the son has baseball practice - going to packing in our meals down there at the new house. 

Through the sickness

Remember that when your overweight it's hard for your body to change it's used to being over weight.  So during these problems I have such as bloating in my abdomen.  I look like I'm 9 months pregnant.  I didn't want to work out today just lay around but I don't want this problem to over take me.  So I say if I can do it you can do it too.  Even if it's not a workout per say there are things you can do around the house to burn some calories.  Tonight I tried teaching my 8 year old niece to ride a bike without training wheels.  She's scared and I walked then ran beside her as she was learning.  Yep, I said it again I ran!!!   Over and over and over again.  She made progress but hasn't perfected the art of bike riding yet.  At the same time I'm influencing her and showing her another way that could burn calories.  I didn't present it that way to her but that's what it will do for her as she struggles with weight herself. 

Update...

So here I  am still having some medical problems.  I do have alot to be grateful for.  No matter where I've been in life I have my family and friends here.  Since my journey I've acquired more family.  My lifestyle coach Fawn has been here trying to help me through these problems, my church family always here for me, and My Pastor and my friend Marcy always there lending me prayer, hug, and support.  I know that good things are ahead for me and over time they will be revealed.  I can't wait to show all of you the great things that are to come.  Thanks for hanging in there with me!!!  Love everyone!

Turkey soup?

We had a turkey dinner at my mas on Saturday.  She was going to make some soup and had asked me if I wanted some I told her it all depended on what she put in it.  I said however, "Don't make it special just for me."  So she had called me asked if I wanted some and I asked her what she put in it.  She said nothing with the extra sodium.  She used barley instead of noodles, instead of extra broth/base she got on the Internet and found some spices to ad to the soup to increase the flavor.  Not just for myself eating this soup but I'm also proud that she would do it for herself, husband, and anyone else that eats this soup. 

illness.....YUCK

Well since Saturday I've been having this burping and gas that is horrid and yesterday we took off for Syracuse to do some house stuff.  The pants I was wearing hung on my hips.  I had alot of stomach pain as well.  When I got out of the van on the way back  I was so bloated I looked pregnant.  I spent most of last evening in the emergency room.  All they can tell is I have intestinal spasms.  I'm hoping this bloating and stomach pain goes away as it feels as though my stomach is going to burst.  Now the gas and burping is far and few in between and I really have to work for it but feel temporary relief when I do.  Need some relief bad.  After all this work I don't care to look pregnant right now either.  Have a follow up on Wednesday.  Hope everything is back to normal by then.

Another mini family reunion

So planning another mini family reunion.  Planning a healthy meal and also some other options for those families who have kids who will only eat certain things.  Looking ahead to see to seeing family and visiting around good healthy food.  We are starting out with some beef loin or chicken.  Toss salad, butternut squash, asparagus, and of course my Apple, pear, berry compote!!  Just 19 days from now! Any other healthy ideas that would be god to go with this - please leave me a comment and I'll see what I can do and if it's in my plan or I can adapt it to my plan would love to try it!!

Some more changes for me!

So I've haven't been able to grow nails never.  They've always been so weak.  They aren't now.   I think because I have gotten away from eating just carbs now I eat protein with every meal and snack.  They are growing beautiful even with all of my hard work on packing and moving.  They haven't broken or chipped.  I'm actually thinking about painting them!!!  

Also different scenario.  Sorry if it's to much info.  Here goes!  When out at a store or restaurant in the past I've waited for the handicap toilet as I felt I was so closed and I'm not clausterphobic.  I also felt like I wasn't properly able to used the restroom.  Today I was taking my 3 year old in and we both had to go and the handicap toilet was out of use.  We both managed in  a regular stall just fine.  I feel better about myself not having to use the handicap toilet.  My weight shouldn't handicap me and I won't let it anymore!!!  Like I said sorry about the TMI!

Wimp, wimp no more!!!

Since we've moved to this house I was pregnant with my second child.  After I had him I fell and re injured my back.  I gained alot of weight then.  We've lived here since October 2007.  Since then I really haven't been able to do any "manual labor"  that involves more than light work.  As we are purging, packing, and getting ready to move I have found out that I am completely able to pack and get rid of things we don't use as we are putting what's leftover in the dumpster.  It's a high dumpster and I have enough muscle to keep going and repetitively lifting things in there.  It's not one thing at a time.  A box of this or that and doing some sweating while I'm at it.  I'm impressed with myself it's great to be able to see my body do this again. 

A weigh in ...

So my first official weigh in will be the first week I'm off my medications.  However, I did weigh in this monday.  After I lost myself for those couple of days I started everything again and I got back at working at my goals and again put myself back into this journey emotionally.  I do think before I removed myself emotionally and don't know how but I'm glad to be back.  So now everyone's wondering..... what happened at the weigh in.  The 3 lbs I gained I lost those so I'm back to where I started!!!!   I have been terribly busy with preparations to buying our own home. 

This Birthday Sunday at church was like no others.  We had always had cupcakes and some type of fruitpunch drink.   The past couple sundays I had brought in fruit trays and majority of the  people never ate cupcakes.  So we got together and made fruit parfaits.  Healthier and YUMMY ones.  Some of the kids even went back for seconds.  We also served it with water and had lemons available for flavor.  Some wern't used to the healthier option and couldn't wrap their minds around not having cupcakes but in time I think it and they will be fine. 

Dissapointment

So, things have been up and down for me lately.  I've been busy and have had some health problems where it's depleted me.  For those healthy problems I've been on medication that has messed with my mind and have had some points of depression.  On top of my lower motivation and energy I had a couple of bad days eating.  I didn't eat 6 times a day - I only ate 2 to 3 times a day.  When I did eat I did eat more than normal and I even went and ate some premade chocolate chip cookie dough.  Before I have made decisions to have something less healthier than my normal everyday food.  I didn't feel like I was in control of what I was eating.  However, I was.   On top of this Fawn and some others knew there wasn't something "right" about me.  They we're checking in on me and I went right back to who I was before.  I lied about it.  I told them everything was fine.  Then I was embarrassed and disappointed in myself for falling and disappointing everyone who's helped me get here. What I hadn't realized is that It's okay to have a bad day or two.  Even if it was a week and I realized what was happening and I got back up and went after my goals again.  MY GOAL not to loose a bunch of weight - but to be healthy and eat healthy.  To deal with my emotions in a healthy way.  I also realized that these people loved me unconditionally.  I've always tried to please people.  However I never realized how much I never wanted to disappoint people.  As I am human and will never be perfect I need to try and worry about myself and my individual family and not be petrified of what others are going to say.  I feel better now coming out with the truth and lifts alot of weight off my chest.  Some of the side effects  that I had from eating the less unhealthy food are excessive tiredness, stomach pain, awful gas, and the burping tasted like well I'd rather not say and you'd rather not know I'm sure.  I know that some of these toxins are still in my body and as I eat clean day after day my body will be cleansed of these feelings and bad food.  I had a small mishap on dealing with my emotions and life and I'm back on track and from now on I will be completely honest in letting people know if I feel things heading wrong again.  I will reach out for help and support as I know I have those people in my life.  As for anyone else who has this problem in their life where they try to start eating healthier you deserve to pick yourself back up and get on the healthy plan again.  If you can't do it on your own - talk to someone who's there to support you.

So a brand new awakening!!

As I said before I'm having trouble sleeping.  I did years ago as I gained weight.  I had boughten one of the arm pillows and used that to elevate me.  Last night as I tried sleeping without it - I had a great night of sleep.  I'm tired now and thinking about heading into bed and will be trying it without my arm pill or chair pillow.  Just a regular pillow.  Don't know if things work like this but now that i'm under the weight I was for along time years ago maybe I need to go back to the old sleeping habbits.  I will keep you posted!

Life..

So here we are in another week of being on meds and not weighing in.  I'm really wondering if not weighing until I'm off these meds is the right thing.  I really need to up the exercise more just extremely tired.  I'm having problems sleeping.  The weeks and months ahead don't seem like the busy times will end soon.  My husband and I just bought a house with closing coming soon.  We need to get packed and then start making improvements on our new home so we can get moved in.  I also have to get all the paperwork and school information transferred back to New York State.  That's just the extra stuff. Therapy, doctors appointments, eating, sleeping, homework, and living life are some of the every day normal things that we will be doing on top of these new moving things.  We have a pretty big family dinner coming up in april, Easter, My oldest son's birthday, baseball and softball season, a getaway in august, and 10 years of marriage celebrated in september.  The way I look at being busy is that before I had lost all this way, it's not something I could do or care to do.  My desire for living life is stronger than ever.  Off to back some more boxes!!!

sleep

So as sleep has become difficult because at times I have been able to sleep others not so well.  I used to love to sleep on my stomach I haven't been since I was pregnant with my second child.  Well I was having a hard night sleeping the other night I was able to roll over and be comfortable on my stomach - I can't believe it!!!!  That sleep that night was awesome!!! Can't wait for more nights like that.  Regaining some of my energy and pushing forward!

It's been awhile!

So here I am, sorry it's been a while!  Tomorrow is Monday, but I won't be going to my weigh in.  Yep, that's right you heard me - I won't be going to my weigh in.  Recently I have had some medical problems completely unrelated to my weight loss that has been making me have very low energy and no motivation.  As I recover I have been put on some new meds that can have me gain weight.  I know I have put on some this week already.  I've talked to Fawn and I have decided to not weigh in until my medications are done with.  I'm going to try and eat extra clean and up my cardio as well.  I don't want my weight well on medications to play "games" with my mind.   I will continue to blog and let you know about changes but I will not weigh in for now.   I did get into a size 24 pants!!!!    Please pray for me as I go through this hard time - may it not deter me from pushing through these problems and continuing to get healthier!!!

Cheers to the changes!!

So at the end of my icky feeling stage I could finally taste food again.  Boy was I sorry about that.  I wanted some chinese so I got a small portion of chicken and broccoli with brown rice.  I miss chinese so much or at least I thought I did!! I got sick from that with bad stomach cramps.  My body is used to all this clean and healthy food and took something with so much sodium and my body reacted to it.  How do you know it's this because it happened the one time that I chicken and broccoli before since I started my journey.  I know this is the word of God saying Carolyn your body will better tolerate this if you try and make a healthier version at home.  This is some awful stuff.  I don't want these cramps again and I don't want the chinese again.  I could say it was the place but I used to eat there before my journey.  So it's just my body reacting to less healthy food.  I thought this would upset me but it doesn't.  I'm good after all why wouldn't my body want healthier food???

Snow storm of the year

So there will be no way in today.  We've had the storm of the year - at least I'm hoping.  I don't like missing my weigh in. That scale is my accountability partner.  I know sometimes it doesn't reflect what work I put in but that's okay.  For so long I didn't look at the scale.  I thought it better to just not know how big I was.  How much I weighed.  I would never look into full length mirrors!!!   It's amazing what you do to hide how unhealthy you are. 

This weeks a busy one our little son Ben has his MRI tomorrow to see what's going on inside his back.  I've been waiting for this just need to see if we can still do it as his physical was today and his Dr's office is closed so we are waiting to see what can be done.  I don't want them to have to reschedule.  He's been waiting an awful long time then we'll also have to go back through the insurance channels.

So it's a long snowed in day already.  Need to get some things done and accomplished so I guess it's off to a in - house workout!!!

One of the most important changes!!!!!

While I was updating I forgot to tell you!  I can't believe I forgot!  I am so psyched over this.  I used to ride electric carts in stores because I didn't have the energy and my back would hurt so back and I wouldn't be able to do anything else.  So now I can handle walking.  What's the next step .....move faster than a fast walk.  I did that when Fawn was up!  I RAN!!!!  I didn't run to go get a child as they got hurt I ran longer distance than that.  I thought the first time I ran I wouldn't be able to move anymore that day, but I moved, It felt really invigorating.  It also was an accomplishment!! I didn't fail!   

"Once you choose HOPE anything is possible" - Christopher Reeve

New Updates!

So here are some more changes.  I was at walmart today and was able to find a clearance rack!!! Go figure me find one?!!!!  Anyways, I seen this black shirt I liked it was a 16/18 I held it up in front of me to see if I was close.  My husband and oldest son both said something to not yet!!  I said I think so, so I tried it on and it looked good!! It wasn't a shirt that was meant to be baggy.  I also found some tank shirts like exercise shirts.  I have been wearing a 2xl in most shirts but these were xlarge.  Changes are happening even if I don't loose any weight this week.

Normally when I weigh in I'm wearing shorts and a tshirt.  I haven't been able to wear those because they are so big.  To me this next change is the most awesome.  When I met my hubby I weighed 220.  On our first date I had on these blue mesh pants that zip on the bottom.  As I was going through my clothes to get rid of them because they don't fit, I stumbled upon these same pants as they were in the bottom of my dresser.  They we're a large.  I'm 264 lbs and thought at 44 lbs difference they wouldn't fit.  Well I didn't know if they would fit.   I've learned not to under estimate the work that the I put into myself and now the work of the mindset part and how the Lord has changed me I know that if I can't fit into something now, I will later.  They don't look the best but it's only time before they do and then I'm in a smaller pair of pants yet!! So take a look......

                             

Not only do you notice difference in size but I'm also not afraid to have people look at me so I posted in a spaghetti strap top n pants that are just barely fitting.  I did this for me and you so that you can see the difference since I started but also differences in the future.  When I wear these clothes again and they aren't skin tight then we'll see some changes.  Another change is that you see I haven't pulled my hair back.  It's cut and I do it every day!! I actually care about how I look not for others but for me as well as others.  I don't want to show up at my son's school and have his friends make fun of him because of my weight or because I don't take care of myself.  Besides the hair I've learned correctly how to put on makeup, flat iron my hair, and have had jewelry on.  O the changes in just 5 months!!!

 

Weight in #20

As the weeks move on some say it's harder to loose weight because your body gets used to the calories, food, and exercise you do so that you have  some stand still time with the weight.  That doesn't mean that your body doesn't change.  Remember before when I didn't loose, I was still able to fit into jeans those weeks which was new for me than the weeks before.  It's truly not a number for me finally.  I wasn't upset, I didn't punish myself, and I just went on with my my day.  That's because I didn't loose any this week.  I do need to get some measurements and new pics up to show you all some other ways in which to change besides numbers.

Starting weight                             338 lbs
last week weight                           264lbs
this week weight                           264 lbs
weight loss this week                      0 lbs
Total weight loss                            74 lbs

Still on my way to health!!!!

AWWWWW.....Isn't it just so beautiful?

So.... At our church we have a birthday celebration to celebrate the birthdays of those months together.  We have had cupcakes, brownies, cookies, etc.    The past 2 months I have brought fruit platters.  The first month 1/4th of the people ate fruit.  This month over 3/4 of the people ate fruit.  Hardly any of the cupcakes were touched.  So alot of people thought that the cupcakes are no longer needed!!!! So we are going to bring in something healthier.  This next month is fruit parfaits.!!!!!!!!!! Praise the Lord, Amen!!!!!

Changes

I have learned to like change at least in me physically and emotionally.  Before one of the fellow journiers mentioned she went down in shoe sizes.  I figured, yeah right - how could that be.  Well I found out I should believe people when they say things.  My feet are wide and my shoes were snug.  Since my journey my feet have started to slip and slide in my tied shoes.  Another change My hands used to be really plump where you couldn't really tell where my knuckles were.  Now you can see them and they are pretty defined now.  So when you start to loose weight your muscle is attaching to the bones etc but the fat starts to  loosen up and fall away from the muscle and bones.  I thought it would make me feel bad but it makes me feel good because progress is happening!  I also took a friend who's started on this journey to her gym.  Guess what I was able to show her and explain to her what to do with her gym equipment which is much older and different then what I was used too.  Our gym has signs with explanations of how to use the equipment and where you should feel the effects.  I don't need those signs anymore.  I was able to know what part of the body it was affecting.  All this and in 31 years never stepping foot inside a gym!   This journey has been a blessing to me.  Not only in the send of loosing fat, weight, and inches but because he has provided me with a purpose in life now.  To help others around me or anyone I can help that needs it.  It's also provided me with a greater sense of love for myself.  It's also helped me get my priorities in order.  I'm hoping to get the rest of my life in order.   I am so blessed.  I have never been on a "diet" this long.  I have never lost this much weight.  I haven't been this active in many many years! 

Gym time!!!

I usually go to the gym in the morning but I've been going in the evening on Wednesday's the past couple anyway.  I was so excited to see a mother of a kid that bowls on the same league as my son there.  She just started but I'm sure she will persevere.  I know many people who are trying to work on themselves.  It can be tough when there isn't a unified front in the household when it comes to the eating aspect.  That's why when I seen a couple there that I know from church it made my heart smile.  It's much more busy in the evening but it's great to see people of all ages and sizes there trying to work on themselves.   I think that everyone is worth it and we should make ourselves available to help everyone with change - good change.  Hooray!!!!! and Congratulations to all of you who are stepping out and investing in themselves.   To those who are supporting others who need to change  - Thank you!!!!!

Parties????

As I keep hosting my children's birthday parties our family dinners I keep trying to ad in healthy food in general for everyone to eat.  Things that we usually have for my son Mark's party are Hamburg patties, hot dogs, white rolls, pasta salad, fruit salad, macaroni salad, baked beans, salt potatoes, and macaroni and cheese.  I believe all those options just make you want to get more food to at least try everything.  So I've decided to cut down what choices we have and modify the dishes that are left so we can make them healthier.  I'm gonna work off the method of healthy protein, carb, and fat as I sit here writing up the menu.  I think we will go with a pasta salad, fruit salad, have 1/2 whole wheat rolls and 1/2 white rolls to figure out some healthier ways for the food and shopping for some great deals on meat any kind!

Weigh in #19

So today is weigh in 19, I had no idea what to expect because even though you work really hard one week you don't loose anything and then your physically unable to move your body the next and all your doing is following your meal plan that week you drop weight.  So just because you didn't drop weight one week doesn't mean you didn't do your best or that you did something wrong.  It's really hard to understand your body, I don't even try to do that in regards to weight anymore.  It's worse than getting to know how the opposite sex  works!  




Starting weight                             338 lbs
last week weight                           266.5lbs
this week weight                           264 lbs
weight loss this week                      2.5 lbs
Total weight loss                            74 lbs


Woohoo! Can't believe it I'm doing it!!!!

New Yay!!!!!

When I contact fawn via text to tell her something in my life has changed for me, gotten better she responds with yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   That's how I feeling about them as well.  So as far as yay!!!!!!!!!!'s go here's another one.   I've had a problem standing between our pews at church.  Today during church I didn't feel as though I didn't fit.  I felt there was plenty enough room for me.  So today I didn't stand in the aisle to sing.  Eventually there will be more room as the lbs get worked off.   Yep, that's what I said.  Worked off!!!!!  It takes exercise, eating healthier food, and the mindset for me to change my thoughts and feelings about food and how I deal with them. 

Health & Fitness Seminar!!!!!

While Fawn was here we had organized this health and fitness seminar.  There was testimony, we talked about mind set, exercise, and food.  We answered questions, gave examples of better food choices, and watched a brilliant movie produced by our friend and coach Fawn!  Everyone who came with the intentions of getting something from the evening left with some information to better themselves.  Either healthier options or the knowledge of different inexpensive exercises.  Some are stepping up for themselves and committing themselves to a whole change MIND, BODY, and SOUL!!!  Praise the Lord this seminar reached 31 adults looking for the help.  There we're also 4 children there!  So awesome to see Elmira NY start to transform itself one person at a time!!!!!

Weight in # 18

So early this morning my co-journier Dawn and I went to weigh in.  I was so extremely proud of Dawn.  She lost 5.25 lbs!!!! She's had a slow go but a little here and little there as long as you stay with it!! Congratulations.   I've had a work out with Fawn since she's been here.  She told me she was going to shock my system so my body would start loosing weight again.  She accomplished that goal and I"m so happy about it!!!!!

Starting weight                    338lbs
last week weight                 270lbs
This week weight               266.5lbs
Weight loss this week        3.5lbs
Total weight loss                71.5 lbs


New smaller goal - to get that scale notch to start and 200 not 250.  I'm going to talk to fawn because I would need to see how long it might take me to loose 16 lbs to set a good goal time.  Something that's challenging, realistic, but not really a sure thing.  That would be awesome for the scale to start at 200!!!!

Playing dress up???

As far as I'd remember I'd rather be riding atv's, fishing, camping, etc.  I don't ever remember a time when I was "girly."  I never like dolls that much,"in clothing", doing my hair, or makeup.  Knowing your accomplishing something for God, yourself, and those around you just brings such joy to your heart.  It encourages you in so many ways.  I pray that more people would know that God saw fit for this to be my journey on his time.  He had his reasons why the past "diets" didn't work besides they don't what make sense to me now.  On to the change I've experienced.  Thanks to a wonderful friend and co-journier I have some of her old clothes but new clothes to me.  Thanks a bunch Kathleen!!!  They aren't plain t-shirts and knit pants as I am used to.  I used them because they are easy to match and they kept growing with me up to that 4x.  Now I have shirts and pants made of different fabric and patterns.  Last night - I kept trying on different clothes to try and find a "outfit" for today!! I'm about to go do that again to find clothes for tomorrow!!! I've had makeup on for the past 3 days!!! That's after I had Fawn's help on try to figure out how to apply it and make it look good!  Thanks again Fawn!!!  I never realized I wanted to be "girly"!!!!!!

Guess what....

So the other day I tried on a old pair of jeans they were a 28.  I had an old pair of 26's.  I thought they would be snug and probably wouldn't fit by an inch or so.  I put them on - they aren't loose but they do fit and not tight either.  It feels so good to be back into jeans.  It makes feel like I have something to offer.  That's not related to clothes.  When you can respect yourself others can too.  Knowing I couldn't fit into a pair of jeans destroyed my self esteem.  So I'm moving forward with self esteem.  Life gets better and happier every day forward of my journey. 

Here's your chance!!!!

February 15th 7 pm at Elmira Wesleyan Church in Elmira NY there will be a Nutrition and Fitness program.  This is based on the Journey to Transformation.  My lifestyle coach Fawn will be there to give out information and answer any questions that you have.  If you need directions or anything let me know.  Hope to see you there!!!

Take it here's your chance.  To change your life.  It would be great for anyone to start with something small.  Remember it doesn't have to be all or nothing.  Come take a look you don't have to commit to anything. 

New jeans or old jeans

Two weeks ago I weighed in and lost 7 lbs.  I tried on a pair of my old jeans and they didn't fit.  I was bummed.  So today for the heck of it I pulled them out again, went to try them on and they fit!!! I was so excited.  Eating right and exercising can make a difference even if lbs are not shed!!  These old jeans seem new to me because I haven't been able to get into any jeans since 5/2007. 


Today I trained with Fawn, she took me through workouts that I was avoiding.  I was tired from working out but I haven't began to hurt.  Probably tomorrow I will.  In fact I'm sure of it.  So glad to be doing new things now and know I can survive.  That I will grow and thrive because of it. 

 Challenge yourself!!!! Mentally and physically.  You are so worth it!

Weigh in #17

So todays weigh in was completely different than any I've ever had.  Fawn was there!  Sadly today I have to explain that once again this week I didn't loose any weight.  I didn't gain any either.  Fawn has told me next week I will.  She's here and going to help me with some different exercise programs and get me in some good butt kicking workouts.  I'm also excited that I get to be in some stuff that Fawn will be taping to do a promo video for herself.  Anything I can do to help her out.  She has done so much for me.  So here's off to another week devoted to loosing weight. 

Tomorrow on tuesday my youngest son Ben is having his tonsils removedso hopefully  his healing is good so I can make sure I don't loose to much workout time.


Starting weight                          338 lbs
Last week weight                       270 lbs
This week weight                       270 lbs
Total weight loss this week             0 lbs
Total weight loss                          68 lbs

On to another week of eating healthy ... and taking back my life!!!!!   Come on we can help you too!

My new song!!!!

We're off to see the Fawn, The wonderful Fawn of all
We here she is a whiz of a wiz, if ever a wiz there was
If ever, oh ever a wiz there was, The Fawn of all is one because
Because, because, because, because, because,
Because of the wonderful things she does
We're off to see the Fawn, the wonderful Fawn of all.

Can you all tell I'm just a "little" giddy to see Fawn.  For me and those of you who know me this is like Christmas in my heart!!!

Time to way in with truth factor!!!! There's no shaving of any legs to help loose a little or alot of extra weight.  No just kidding we weigh in like that every week. 

So off to the chiropractor so we can head over to the weigh in!!!!!

One meal at a time...

Someone close to me who's working on getting healthier was challenged this evening.  It's the super bowl and as others get out there normal party food they were getting around pizza.  This person avoided pizza.  Instead I was able to get them to make a healthier pizza while everyone else consumed their normal pizza.  It's hard to do that, but if your serious about making a change any one of you can do this!!  So proud!!!  Keep going, believe in yourselves, reach out to help you stay on track.  It could be a recipe, or it could be keeping you on track so your not grabbing that candy bar or eating 2 or 3 times the amount of food for one sitting.  Anyone of us will be here for you. 

A healthy dinner for our clc kids!!!

This evening we had clc early so that people could go home and watch the super bowl.  So dinner time was right in there so making sure to get my dinner we made home made pizza.  We used whole wheat sandwich thins, organic low sodium fat free sauce, fat free mozzarella, pepperoni, and any veggies they wanted to add. 

It was mixed feeling.  Some thought the pepperoni was spicy, others loved it!  We're getting there step by step.  That's all you need to accomplish something or help others learn that healthy food is good.  Just baby steps.  It will happen!!!

My Fawn is in NY!!!!! can't belive it!  I get to see her tomorrow!!!!